Jennifer Saunders Quotations

When I was a child, a lot of my time was spent in Scotland because my mother's Scottish, and we used to go up to Ayrshire and visit relations in a place called Dalry.

Like all girls, when I was growing up, I always worried about this bit of me being too fat or that bit. But I look back at pictures of me when I was young, and I was thin and gorgeous.

My job gives me the attention I'd otherwise crave.

My daughters related to something in the Spice Girls that made them feel better about being female. They truly started to believe girls could do anything. They could be fat, thin, anything they wanted to be.

I did want a boy child because I had this romantic idea that a boy child when he's 16 takes his mother out for dinner.

I came to the Kardashians a bit late, and I'm still just gob-smacked. Who are these people?

I'm a really good driver. I've been driving since I was very small, and I do like driving fast. I remember the first time my dad taught me that when you go into a corner you change down then put your foot right down on the way out. I'm very competitive about driving.

I always swore I would never write a book. But I read Clare Balding's and it was really interesting and so prettily written and lovely and not too revealing. I went to her book launch and met her editor who said 'why don't you think about it? You can do it however you want, based on your characters or you.'

I absolutely love Scotland. I'm always happy there.

I think it is a bit harder for women starting in comedy.

I think the idea of losing your hair is still very potent, emotional thing.

I think when Madonna did sexy stuff, she looked more in control. And I think it looked more like she was breaking boundaries. Today, it feels like it's pandering to everything that's wrong, and I don't think it's nice, especially for young girls.

I think people imagine that your fame somehow sort of equates with how much you get paid.

I write for women because it's the only way I can use what I've experienced. It's good that people like what I write, but I don't want to go down the feminist path.

Men would find it much harder because men have such odd personal relationships with each other. They don't really emotionally connect, whereas women do. I think women become very close.

We were watching the first series recently, and it has a charm, a kind of amateur charm. At that point we didn't involve ourselves technically at all - we just messed about and told our jokes - and it looks a bit like that.

When you are doing chemo, you have a load of time.

We had this party in New York, and there were a lot of gay men there dressed up as the characters. I showed up just looking like myself, but it was a real case of shame. They looked so fantastic. We could never quite live up to it.

Commissioners are obsessed with young people, which is funny because they don't watch telly - only old people do.

And this reality TV thing. That's the biggest change; that you don't have to do anything to become famous on TV.

I've never had Botox. But I like people to imagine I have.

The way certain men treat women is influenced by the Internet a lot.

'The Rocky Horror Show' was actually my first musical love.

I used to take someone with me for the chemotherapy so I could do jokes. You always try and find something absurd.

They have become part of us in that if we get dressed up as them, we don't actually have to have a script. You can just become them. You just become nervy.

There were a lot of areas we didn't cover that I'm hoping to cover if we do some specials. One is to see more of Patsy's home and her home life, which is just the saddest thing.

It seems you can take a picture on your Vodafone and it can be on the front page of a celebrity magazine the next day. It's a kind of madness,

I'm my own worst critic. I could tell the critics a thing or two about my shows.

I'm a walkawayer. If someone brings me a really crap meal in a restaurant I will tell them it's wonderful and then just never go to the restaurant again. I think that's the best way to do it generally, rather than sit and fight and annoy your head. Just pretend to enjoy it and then leave.

I'm a total petrolhead. My three brothers and I used to ride scrambling bikes in the field near where we lived. We all liked cars. I've always loved the smell of an engine.

I recommend a little dose of cancer to anyone.

I haven't got time in my life to do all the things I should be doing, like running and dieting and decorating my house, buying some furniture.

But I think our humour is exactly the same today. Only, we've made rules now. We've said we are not going to do prosthetic make-up scenes, because when they take it off half your face comes off.

I did grieve a bit when I wasn't having the chemo anymore. I was used to sitting in the little chair and then the nurse would come and do it. It was like that was your job for that long and it was reassuring.

Well, I'm lucky because, you see, I'll probably bounce back from this role.

I grew up with a mother who, every time she saw something, would say, I'm going to look that up. And I've become that person - I've become the reference-book person.

I'd much rather have sat there and just been a fly on the wall, instead of having to smile at people. I'd rather have been a waitress. Just gone round and stared at people.

I remember when the first police scary video thing came out, and you thought, wow, ooh, look at this, come and look, come and look. And now it's on every channel.

I love the TV show, and if you make a bad movie it means you've soiled it. Just like if we made an advert. We were offered so many times and I'd say, look, this is the good thing, and you can't compromise that, because then you compromise the integrity of the characters.

I can remember the first face-lift show that came on. I rang up everyone - are you watching? I'm watching.

The reason they keep it so tight is that no one liked them, so that without each other, actually, they couldn't exist. They support each other. They support their flaws and everything else.

No, sometimes we just have to take liberties because the idea was so good. I wish we'd just gone with the idea that Patsy had been a man. It would have been fantastic.

The biggest thing is online shopping. So that you don't have to dress up, go down Bond Street or Rodeo or wherever, go and be intimidated by shop assistants to buy Gucci shoes or a Prada dress. You can just go online and, if it doesn't fit you, send it back. And I think that is the biggest, biggest difference, because that means everybody can do it.

You get crushes on people. You have to see them every day in that week. They're a fantastic person, and it could be a man or a woman.

Lacroix has been fantastic. He's very nice. He gets the joke, and I think that's a good thing.

Instant coffee is just old beans that have been cremated.

I think people love to be noticed, they love to feel included. A lot of people are flattered if you, you know, if you make jokes about them, or I think because it means they're known.

At home, I relax by gardening, or just pottering.

Well, I would definitely give up performing... But I would still sit down in an office and pretend to write with Dawn, even if we never produced anything, because it's just hilarious. I would miss that.

Me just being myself in public or on TV is the biggest nightmare in the world.

I cannot do confrontation. You know that fight or flight thing? I'm flight. I just don't want the argument.

The truth is, you can be honest with your friends - but you just can't be honest with the general public if you want to keep your friends.