Joke Quotations | Page 4

We used to joke that more stories were written about reverse mortgages than loans originated.

We used to joke that if you go into labor we'll drag you out to the sidewalk.

We used to joke about Jerry Bailey's rail pass. He was an inside rider. That's where the fearless riders go. It's the shortest way around the race track - and the most dangerous.

I got so much out of 'The To-Do List.' This is a joke that I say about myself sometimes, in terms of my film career: I feel like I'm always playing the kid in serious adult movies. So, for me, it was so wonderful to suddenly be working with other people my age who were doing this on film.

Real racist jokes or sexist jokes aren't funny - not because they're offensive, but because they're not true. As soon as a joke is based on an untruth, it's not funny.

There is nothing in the world so incomprehensible as the joke we do not see.

We were trying to make a movie that was funny, but also trying to be smart about being funny. We just wanted to make people laugh,. If you want to make a comedy you just don't want to hit people in the groin for two hours, even though that's really funny too. We wanted our jokes to have a little weight to them.

We were trying to joke around as much as possible. Well, as much as you could in that . . . eventually it got really not funny.

We were trendsetters, ... But people would joke 'Here comes the ice cream truck.' Now it's not unusual to see white limos at a funeral home.

Larry David finds a way to make jokes about the Holocaust. It would never have occurred to me. And it was funny.