What's a philosopher?' said Brutha. Someone who's bright enough to find a job with no heavy lifting,' said a voice in his head.
I could be wrong. Not being certain is what being a philosopher is all about.
In the words of the philosopher Sceptum, the founder of my profession: am I going to get paid for this?
We're philosophers. We think, therefore we am.
Are you a philosopher? Where's your sponge?
I used to think that I was stupid, and then I met philosophers.