Elayne Boosler Women Quotations

I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something is wrong with me.

Ever notice that Soup for One is eight aisles away from Party Mix?

You never see a man walking down the street with a woman who has a little potbelly and a bald spot.

I'm just a person trapped inside a woman's body.

I can tell by your eye shadow, you're from Brooklyn, right? . . . Me too. My mother has plastic covers on all the furniture. Even the poodle. Looked like a barking hassock walking down the street.