Karl Pilkington Thinking Quotations

People eat duck and you think, well, we've got loads of chickens, leave the ducks alone!

I just sort of go along and say what I think -and that's all you can do in life, really.

I don't think I'd be a very good parent. I'd be too honest.

There is someone for everyone, i'nt there. That's always my thing. And it's reassuring I think.

I am pessimistic, I think that's the best way to be, because if you're always expecting the best - the best doesn't always happen. Nine times out of 10 it doesn't. I'm surprised when things go smoothly. I don't know what's wrong with being pessimistic - unless you are such a pessimist that you don't do anything.

The problem I have with all this religion stuff is that I can't relate to it. I think most people got into 'cos it gave them something to do on a Sunday, but since all the shops are now open it isn't required as much.

I think it's clever how Rome have kept a load of old stuff. There's no overheads, yet people are going over there to see it.

Well I'm trying to think what I put in... I think I put in 'why?' to see if I'd confuse the computer.

I don’t think I’ve ever felt this lost, even in Wales.

The other day I was thinking - because I get a lot of headaches - I was wondering whether the head should be where it is. Because, at the end of the day, it's probably the heaviest part of your body, right? And yet it's at the top as opposed to, I don't, dangling at the bottom somewhere.

There’s fish in here that I’ve read about that are so see-through that they’re invisible. So I don’t even think they know they exist.

I told her that I can't be doing with the Wonder part of these trips, but she said it should be the icing on the cake... I've never liked wedding cake due to the amount of icing, but then imagine a wedding cake without it; just a dark, stodgy, horrible dry sponge. The icing covers up the mess, and that's how I feel about most of the Wonders. They use them to get people to visit a place that you probably wouldn't think about visiting.

Classes teaching you how to breathe. I'm 32, I think I've got the hang of it.

People moan about drugs being tested on animals. I sort of think it depends innit. If the drug's aspirin and the monkey's got a headache, is it right?

I'm a bit rubbish at knowing when something is good. But if it goes out and I can say, "I wasn't as bad as I thought I would be", then I'll be happy. Until then, I'll be thinking, "I shouldn't be here!"

I think people would live a bit longer if they didn't know how old they were. Age puts restrictions on things.