Famous Quotes & Sayings

Larry David

People have often wondered how they'd feel if they were adopted. I think it's funny.

Maybe in order to understand mankind we have to look at that word itself. MANKIND. Basically, it's made up of two separate words mank and ind. What do these words mean? It's a mystery and that's why so is mankind.

Susan Stroman

Mel has written 10 new songs, and they're very funny. It's a year and a half away from opening on Broadway.

Billy Corgan

The funny thing about me that most people never really understand is that, at heart, I'm really a jock.

Bill Shankly

A football team is like a piano. You need eight men to carry it and three who can play the damn thing.

Bill Engvall

He knows all the golf lingo. You know? You hit your ball, he's like "there's a golf shot. That's a golf shot." Well of course it's a golf shot; I just hit a golf ball. You don't see Gretzky skating around going "there's a hockey shot, that's a hockey shot."

Bill Engvall

My son is 12 now, and is really getting into girls. A lot. But the thing about twelve year old boys is that they don't possess what I like to call that ... discretionary gene yet. We were walking home from the ballfield the other day and there was a woman walking towards us who was ... gifted. I saw them, and I saw him see them. But she was too close for me to go, "Dude, shut up." She hadn't walked two feet behind us and he goes "God dang, did you see the SIZE of those things?" And all I could say was "Yeah, I did!"

Bill Engvall

No parents. You have Uncle Jesse, forever in overalls. Then there's Bo and Duke. What do they do? I never saw them working for food or gas money. You can only kill so many possum.

Bill Engvall

I thought "RV" stood for "Recreational Vehicle." No! It stands for "Ruins Vacations."

Justin Verlander

People in real life don't get ballplayers' humor, the way we talk in the clubhouse.

Stan Heath

Steven has a humorous side to him that you wouldn't expect. I see more of it this season. Life is more normal for him in some ways. He's opening up slowly.

Joanna Lumley

That's the staggering, humorous thing about money. If you haven't got taste, money doesn't matter: You'll always look ghastly.

Karen Leathem

I think it's sort of a trademark quality of New Orleans that people can usually find humor in the worst situations.

Greg Evans

Laugh at yourself once in a while; give yourself a break.

Ed Peterson

I think this is a legislative sense of humor the rest of us don't appreciate.

Stephen J. Cannell

I love 'Dexter.' The dark sense of humor is wonderful.

Carlos Ponce

I can't live without a sense of humor. I need to be laughing and entertained at all times.

Justin Turner

Jamaal is real a humorous and entertaining guy.

Antoine de Saint-Exupery

The tree is a slow, enduring force straining to win the sky.

Antoine de Saint-Exupery

The tree is more than first a seed, then a stem, then a living trunk, and then dead timber. The tree is a slow, enduring force straining to win the sky.

Beck

I never had any expectations of winning a Grammy. It wasn't something I was set on, that I was hoping and praying and starving for.

Bill Shoemaker

If Jack Nicklaus can win the Masters at 46, I can win the Kentucky Derby at 54.

Bill Shoemaker

There are one hundred and ninety nine ways to get beat, but only one way to win; get there first.

Bill Shankly

If you can't support us when we lose or draw, don't support us when we win

Bill Cosby

You go and you buy a lottery ticket. You've got just as much chance of getting struck by lightning as you do of winning the lottery.

Bhagat Singh

Non-violence is backed by the theory of soul-force in which suffering is courted in the hope of ultimately winning over the opponent. But what happens when such an attempt fail to achieve the object? It is here that soul-force has to be combined with physical force so as not to remain at the mercy of tyrannical and ruthless enemy.

Big Sean

I want to win some awards, sell more records - just do whatever I want.