Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them.
If you're not getting older, you're dead.
You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
After thirty, a body has a mind of its own.
I'm at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
Every year on your birthday, you get a chance to start new.
When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half.
You know you're getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It's like, 'See if you can blow this out.'
Pie can’t compete with cake. Put candles in a cake, it’s a birthday cake. Put candles in a pie, and somebody’s drunk in the kitchen.
Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time.