Sex: the thing that takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of trouble.
During sex I fantasize that I'm someone else.
My wife is a sex object. Every time I ask for sex, she objects.
I don't have sex drive... I have sex 'just sit in the car and hope someone gets in'.
What I like about masturbation is that you don't have to talk afterwards.
Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire.
Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.
No matter how much cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
Were kisses all the joys in bed, One woman would another wed.
The French are funny, sex is funny, and comedies are funny, yet no French sex comedies are funny.