You might be a redneck if you've ever stolen toilet paper from a public restroom.
You might be a redneck if your satellite dish payment delays buying school clothes for the kids.
You might be a redneck if your pocketknife has ever been referred to as Exhibit A.
You might be a redneck if you think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs.
You might be a redneck if your sophisticated show-biz cousin is a rodeo clown.
You might be a redneck if your handkerchief doubles as your shirt sleeve.
You might be a redneck if you watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips.
You might be a redneck if an expired license plate means another decoration for your living room wall.
You might be a redneck if a full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat.
You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather.