Herb Caen Quotations

The precise location of heaven on earth has never been established but it may very well be right here

Satire of satire tends to be self-canceling, and deliberate shock tactics soon lose their ability to shock, especially when they're too deliberate.

I have a memory like an elephant. I remember every elephant I've ever met.

Americans are pragmatic, relatively uncomplicated, hearty and given to broad humor.

The waterfront without the Ferry Tower would be like a birthday cake without a candle.

New Yorkers are stuck in a gloomy mucilage of mutual commiseration.

A city is a crazy concrete jungle whose people at the end of each day somehow make a small step ahead against terrible odds.

San Franciscans have a bond of self-satisfaction bordering on smugness.

You cover Q-tips with sandpaper and ram them up your nostrils as far as they will go. Then you sniff talcum powder while shredding hundred dollar bills.

When a place advertises itself as 'World Famous,' you may be sure it isn't.