Judith Martin Quotations

The language of clothing is high symbolism and we all, in moments where we need to know this, realize it.

The mistake people keep making is that if they find a wonderful new tool, like email, they have to give up all others. They don't. You have simply added another very useful means to your communications repertoire.

Presents are symbolic. When you give them in your personal life, they should show that you are paying attention to the person to whom you're giving them.

We're now seeing email that people thought they had deleted showing up as evidence in court. You can't erase email. As that becomes more commonly realized, people will be a little wiser about what they type.

Freedom without rules doesn't work. And communities do not work unless they are regulated by etiquette.

Etiquette is all human social behavior. If you're a hermit on a mountain, you don't have to worry about etiquette; if somebody comes up the mountain, then you've got a problem. It matters because we want to live in reasonably harmonious communities.

Etiquette does not render you defenseless. If it did, even I wouldn't subscribe to it. But rudeness in retaliation for rudeness just doubles the amount of rudeness in the world.

Obviously I'm going to be polite, so nobody has anything to fear from me.

People who put slipcovers, doilies, plastic protectors, and cellophane on everything good that they own rarely live to see an occasion so good that all these covers are removed.

A general rule of etiquette is that one apologizes for the unfortunate occurrence, but the unthinkable is unmentionable.