Mae West Quotations

Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.

When I'm good, I'm very good. But when I'm bad I'm better.

I'll try anything once, twice if I like it, three times to make sure.

All discarded lovers should be given a second chance, but with somebody else.

Look your best - who said love is blind?

A man can be short and dumpy and getting bald but if he has fire, women will like him.

It's not what I do, but the way I do it. It's not what I say, but the way I say it.

I never loved another person the way I loved myself.

I didn't discover curves; I only uncovered them.

Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.

Cultivate your curves - they may be dangerous but they won't be avoided.

Personality is the most important thing to an actress's success.

I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond.

If I asked for a cup of coffee, someone would search for the double meaning.

Save a boyfriend for a rainy day - and another, in case it doesn't rain.

One and one is two, and two and two is four, and five will get you ten if you know how to work it.

Too much of a good thing can be taxing.

An ounce of performance is worth pounds of promises.

Say what you want about long dresses, but they cover a multitude of shins.

Love isn't an emotion or an instinct - it's an art.

Love conquers all things except poverty and toothache.

It is better to be looked over than overlooked.

I believe that it's better to be looked over than it is to be overlooked.

Whenever I'm caught between two evils, I take the one I've never tried.

Personally, I like two types of men - domestic and foreign.

I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.

Don't keep a man guessing too long - he's sure to find the answer somewhere else.

Ten men waiting for me at the door? Send one of them home, I'm tired.

It isn't what I do, but how I do it. It isn't what I say, but how I say it, and how I look when I do it and say it.

It's not the men in my life that count, it's the life in my men.

I'm no model lady. A model's just an imitation of the real thing.

Those who are easily shocked should be shocked more often.

I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.

Too much of a good thing can be wonderful.

The best way to hold a man is in your arms.

Personality is the glitter that sends your little gleam across the footlights and the orchestra pit into that big black space where the audience is.

You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.

When I'm good I'm very, very good, but when I'm bad, I'm better.

Right now I think censorship is necessary; the things they're doing and saying in films right now just shouldn't be allowed. There's no dignity anymore and I think that's very important.

A dame that knows the ropes isn't likely to get tied up.

Any time you got nothing to do - and lots of time to do it - come on up.

Keep a diary, and someday it'll keep you.

A woman in love can't be reasonable - or she probably wouldn't be in love.

A man has one hundred dollars and you leave him with two dollars, that's subtraction.

I only have 'yes' men around me. Who needs 'no' men?

A man in the house is worth two in the street.

It ain't no sin if you crack a few laws now and then, just so long as you don't break any.

When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.

His mother should have thrown him out and kept the stork.

I've been in more laps than a napkin.

I see you're a man with ideals. I better be going before you've still got them.

He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of.

Every man I meet wants to protect me. I can't figure out what from.

To err is human, but it feels divine.

Opportunity knocks for every man, but you have to give a woman a ring.

I believe in censorship. I made a fortune out of it.

She's the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success wrong by wrong.

I always say, keep a diary and someday it'll keep you.

Give a man a free hand and he'll run it all over you.

I only like two kinds of men, domestic and imported.

When women go wrong, men go right after them.

The score never interested me, only the game.

I enjoyed the courtroom as just another stage but not so amusing as Broadway.

Love thy neighbor - and if he happens to be tall, debonair and devastating, it will be that much easier.

I like a man who's good, but not too good - for the good die young, and I hate a dead one.

It takes two to get one in trouble.

I like restraint, if it doesn't go too far.

Don't marry a man to reform him - that's what reform schools are for.

I'm a woman of very few words, but lots of action.

It's hard to be funny when you have to be clean.

Virtue has its own reward, but no sale at the box office.

I meet a man with a thousand dollars and leave him with two; that's the meaning of subtraction.

The best way to learn to be a lady is to see how other ladies do it.

Too many girls follow the line of least resistance, but a good line is hard to resist.

Money is of value for what it buys, and in love it buys time, place, intimacy, comfort, and a private corner alone.

I've no time for broads who want to rule the world alone. Without men, who'd do up the zipper on the back of your dress?

I freely chose the kind of life I led because I was convinced that a woman has as much right as a man to live the way she does if she does no actual harm to society.

Tira begins to sing "I'm No Angel" to him as the screen fades: Baby, I can warm you with this love of mine. I'm No Angel. Aw, let me feel my fingers running through your hair, I can give you kisses. . . .

Tira: Whatever you're thinkin' you're wrong. I only like him like a brother. You ain't got nothin' to worry about. . . . Say listen you. A better dame than you once called me a liar and they had to sew her up in twelve different places. You're lucky I'm a little more refined than I used to be. And if you was as much a lady as I am, you'd get out of here before I get real sore. Alicia: You haven't a streak of decency in you. Tira: I don't show my good points to strangers. I'll trouble you to scram.

Come up and see me sometime.

I have never been able to sleep with anyone. I require a full-size bed so that I can lie in the middle of it and extend my arms spreadeagle on both sides without being obstructed.

Pour him out of here!

Goodness, what beautiful diamonds!' 'Goodness had nothing to do with it'.

Love is the only industry which can't operate on a five-day week.

Life's just a merry-go-round. Come on up. You might get a brass ring.

Reason was nowhere, time was an immovable object nailed high on the wall, except where the world kept shop.

Sometimes it seems to me I've known so many men that the FBI ought to come to me first to compare fingerprints.

I'm the kinda girl who works for Paramount by day, and Fox all night

A real farmer. He spent his childhood in the wheat, and his marriage in the hay.

all pleasures should be taken in great leisure and are worth going into in detail; love is not like eating a quick lunch with one's hat on.

All the raves were just words. You don't want to let words confuse you. Words come cheap.

Imagine censors that wouldn't let you sit in a man's lap. I've been in more laps than a napkin!

Diamonds talk, and I can stand listenin' to 'em often.

what's life good fer anyhow? The minute you crawl into the world for no good reason of yer own, it's got you licked four ways from the ace.

Live close, visit often.

Girls, give all your gentlemen friends an even break, even if you have to break them in the attempt.

Just a little sheep dip. Panacea for all stomach ailments.

Too many Broadway actors in motion pictures lost their grip on success--had a feeling that none of it had ever happened on that sun-drenched coast, that the coast itself did not exist, there was no California. It had dropped away like a hasty dream and nothing could ever have been like the things they thought they remembered.

Men? Sure, I've known lots of them. But I never found one I liked well enough to marry. Besides, I've always been busy with my work. Marriage is a career in itself and to make a success of it you've got to keep working at it. So until I can give the.

The bite of existence did not cut into one in Hollywood ....