Robert A. Heinlein Quotations

May you live as long as you wish and love as long as you live.

Everything is theoretically impossible, until it is done.

I never learned from a man who agreed with me.

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

One man's 'magic' is another man's engineering. 'Supernatural' is a null word.

Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.

A competent and self-confident person is incapable of jealousy in anything. Jealousy is invariably a symptom of neurotic insecurity.

No statement should be believed because it is made by an authority.

It's an indulgence to sit in a room and discuss your beliefs as if they were a juicy piece of gossip.

By cultivating the beautiful we scatter the seeds of heavenly flowers, as by doing good we cultivate those that belong to humanity.

An armed society is a polite society. Manners are good when one may have to back up his acts with his life.

It is a truism that almost any sect, cult, or religion will legislate its creed into law if it acquires the political power to do so.

When any government, or any church for that matter, undertakes to say to its subjects, This you may not read, this you must not see, this you are forbidden to know, the end result is tyranny and oppression no matter how holy the motives.

The difference between science and the fuzzy subjects is that science requires reasoning while those other subjects merely require scholarship.

They didn't want it good, they wanted it Wednesday.

I am free because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do. I am free, no matter what rules surround me. If I find them tolerable, I tolerate them; if I find them too obnoxious, I break them. I am free because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do.

Don't ever become a pessimist... a pessimist is correct oftener than an optimist, but an optimist has more fun, and neither can stop the march of events.

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwards.

There is no way that writers can be tamed and rendered civilized or even cured. The only solution known to science is to provide the patient with an isolation room, where he can endure the acute stages in private and where food can be poked in to him with a stick.

One of the sanest, surest, and most generous joys of life comes from being happy over the good fortune of others.

The universe never did make sense; I suspect it was built on government contract.

When a place gets crowded enough to require ID's, social collapse is not far away. It is time to go elsewhere. The best thing about space travel is that it made it possible to go elsewhere.

For me, politeness is a sine qua non of civilization.

Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again.

Political tags - such as royalist, communist, democrat, populist, fascist, liberal, conservative, and so forth - are never basic criteria. The human race divides politically into those who want people to be controlled and those who have no such desire.

Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors... and miss.

Theology is never any help; it is searching in a dark cellar at midnight for a black cat that isn't there. Theologians can persuade themselves of anything.

A society that gets rid of all its troublemakers goes downhill.

To be matter-of-fact about the world is to blunder into fantasy - and dull fantasy at that, as the real world is strange and wonderful.

Don't handicap your children by making their lives easy.

One man's theology is another man's belly laugh.

Anyone who considers protocol unimportant has never dealt with a cat.

You can have peace. Or you can have freedom. Don't ever count on having both at once.

The supreme irony of life is that hardly anyone gets out of it alive.

Never worry about theory as long as the machinery does what it's supposed to do.

I don't see how an article of clothing can be indecent. A person, yes.

One could write a history of science in reverse by assembling the solemn pronouncements of highest authority about what could not be done and could never happen.

Was there ever a time when the majority was right? Notebooks of Lazarus Long, Robert A

Love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.

Of all the strange "crimes" that human beings have legislated of nothing, "blasphemy" is the most amazing - with "obscenity" and "indecent exposure" fighting it out for the second and third place.

Never try to teach a pig to sing; it wastes your time and it annoys the pig.

But goodness alone is never enough. A hard cold wisdom is required, too, for goodness to accomplish good. Goodness without wisdom invariably accomplishes evil.

To get anywhere, or even live a long time, a man has to guess, and guess right, over and over again, without enough data for a logical answer.

Human beings hardly ever learn from the experience of others. They learn; when they do, which isn't often, on their own, the hard way.

Jealousy is a disease, love is a healthy condition. The immature mind often mistakes one for the other, or assumes that the greater the love, the greater the jealousy -- in fact, they're almost incompatible; one emotion hardly leaves room for the other. Both at once can produce unbearable turmoil...

Remind me to write an article on the compulsive reading of news. The theme will be that most neuroses can be traced to the unhealthy habit of wallowing in the troubles of five billion strangers.

When any government, or church for that matter, undertakes to say to it's subjects, this you may not read, this you must not see, this you are forbidden to know the end result is tyranny and oppression, no matter how holy the motive.

At least once every human should have to run for his life, to teach him that milk does not come from supermarkets, that safety does not come from policemen, that 'news' is not something that happens to other people. He might learn how his ancestors lived and that he himself is no different--in the crunch his life depends on his agility, alertness, and personal resourcefulness.

Once a month, some women act like men act all the time.

To be matter of fact about the world is to blunder into fantasy -- and dull fantasy at that, as the real world is strange and wonderful.

Women and Cats will do as they please. Men and dogs had better get used to it.

What a wonderful world it is that has girls in it! Notebooks of Lazarus Long, Robert A

Everything is theoretically impossible, until it is done. One could write a history of science in reverse by assembling the solemn pronouncements of highest authority about what could not be done and could never happen.

Do steers sign treaties with meat packers? Robert A

Don't ever become a pessimist, Ira; a pessimist is correct oftener than an optimist, but an optimist has more fun--and neither can stop the march of events.

Another ingredient in a happy marriage: Budget the luxuries first! Notebooks of Lazarus Long, Robert A

Elephants aren't human but they are very nice people.

A poet who reads his own verse in public may have other nasty habits.

Always listen to experts. They'll tell you what can't be done and why. Then do it.

I've found out why people laugh. They laugh because it hurts... because it's the only thing that'll make it stop hurting.

If you disturb the patient at such times, he may break into tears or become violent. and, if you shake him, he bites.

Beds do not matter, it is who is in a bed that counts.

How we behave toward cats here below determines our status in heaven.

The hardest part of gaining any new idea is sweeping out the false ideaoccupying that niche.

A great artist can look at an old woman, portray her exactly as she is... and force the viewer to see the pretty girl she used to be... more than that he can make anyone with the sensitivity of an armidillo see that this lovely young girl is still alive, prisoned inside her ruined body.

A government-supported artist is an incompetent whore! Robert A

All's fair in love and war-what a contemptible lie! Notebooks of Lazarus Long, Robert A

The more you love, the more you can love - and the more intensely you love.

Logic is a feeble reed, friend.

If an elderly respected expert in a given field tells you that something can be done he is almost certainly right. If an elderly respected expert in a given field tells you that something is impossible, he is almost certainly wrong.

Many short-sighted fools think that going to the Moon was just a stunt. But the astronauts knew the meaning of what they were doing, as is shown by Neil Armstrong's first words in stepping down onto the soil of Luna: "One small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind."

But I contend that the disgusting behavior of many of their alleged 'holy men' relieves us of any intellectual obligation to take the stuff seriously. No amount of sanctimonious rationalization can make such behavior anything but pathological.

Learning . . . is - also an end in itself.

Working because you want to is the best sort of play.

Die trying" is the proudest human thing.

Decency is not news. It is buried in the obituaries, but it is a force stronger than crime.

That old saw about the early bird just proves that the worm should have stayed in bed.

Never try to have the last word. You might get it.

Everybody lies about sex.

Never crowd youngsters about their private affairs - sex especially. When they are growing up, they are nerve ends all over, and resent (quite properly) any invasion of their privacy. Oh, sure, they'll make mistakes - but that's their business, not yours. (You made your own mistakes, did you not?)

Coffee comes in five descending stages: Coffee, Java, Jamoke, Joe, and Carbon Remover.

Cast me into a dungeon;, burn me at the state, crown me king of kings, I can 'pursue happiness' as long as my brain lives -- but neither gods nor saints, wise men nor subtle drugs, can insure that I will catch it.

Under our system every voter and officeholder is a man who has demonstrated through voluntary and difficult service that he places the welfare of the group ahead of personal advantage.

Civilians are like beans; you buy 'em as needed for any job which merely requires skill and savvy. But you can't buy fighting spirit.

The more you love, the more you can love--and the more intensely you love. Nor is there any limit on how many you can love. If a person had time enough, he could love all of that majority who are decent and just.

The brown monkey's instinct to kill is correct; such men are dangerous to all monkey customs.

Violence never settles anything should be debated by the ghosts of Hitler and Stalin, with the city fathers of Carthage as referees.

War is not violence and killing, pure and simple; war is controlled violence, for a purpose. The purpose of war is to support your government's decisions by force. The purpose is never to kill the enemy just to be killing him but to make him do what you want him to do. Not killing... but controlled and purposeful violence.

Victory in defeat, there is none higher. She didn't give up, Ben; she's still trying to lift that stone after it has crushed her. She's a father working while cancer eats away his insides, to bring home one more pay check. She's a twelve-year-old trying to mother her brothers and sisters because mama had to go to Heaven. She's a switchboard operator sticking to her post while smoke chokes her and fire cuts off her escape. She's all the unsung heroes who couldn't make it but never quit.

Drop dead-but first get permit

Specialisation is for insects!

Specialization is for insects... The race of man? He's a whole other creature.

Ayn Rand is a bloody socialist compared to me.

In this complex world, the scientific method, and the consequences of the scientific method are central to everything the human race is doing and to wherever we are going.

A long and wicked life followed by five minutes of perfect grace gets you into Heaven. An equally long life of decent living and good works followed by one outburst of taking the name of the lord in vain- then have a heart attack at that moment and be damned for eternity. Is that the system?

If men were the automatons that behaviorists claim they are, the behaviorist psychologists could not have invented the amazing nonsense called 'behaviorist psychology.'

Life is short, but the years are long.

Peace is a condition in which no civilian pays any attention to military casualties which do not achieve a page one lead story unless that civilian is a close relative of one of the casualties. But, if there ever was a time in history when peace meant that there was no fighting going on, I have been unable to find out about it.

He's an honest politician--he stays bought.

Duty is a debt you owe to yourself to fulfill obligations you have assumed voluntarily.