Victor Borge Quotations

...the elephant smoked too much.

My father invented a cure for which there was no disease and unfortunately my mother caught it and died of it.

What is the difference between a Nazi and a dog?The Nazi lifts his arm.

(Shortly after Germany forced Denmark to sign a non-aggression pact in 1939) How nice. Now the Germans can sleep in peace, knowing that they will not be invaded by us.

I do not have a single white note on my piano; my elephant smoked too much.

Beethoven wrote in three flats a lot. That's because he moved twice.

The essence of a general's job is to assist in developing a clear sense of purpose . to keep the junk from getting in the way of important things.

There is a bit of Hans Christian Andersen in every Dane.

If I have caused just one person to wipe away a tear of laughter, that's my reward.

They say that Nero started the fire himself because he needed a suitable backdrop for his concert.