If you have a difficult message to deliver in any circumstance, it's always best to do it first up-front, and probably be a bit harder than you have to be because it's always easier to be nicer afterwards.
If you have a difficult marriage, it's the hard times that make it better. If you have a relationship, it's the hard times that actually make it better, and that goes for life as well.
I have a fear of public speaking. It's very hard work. Words are not my skill, and because they're not my skill, I have to work doubly hard.