Steven Wright Fall Quotations

You know how it is when you're reading a book and falling asleep, you're reading, reading... and all of a sudden you notice your eyes are closed? I'm like that all the time.

You know when you're sitting on a chair and you lean back so you're just on two legs and you lean too far so you almost fall over but at the last second you catch yourself? I feel like that all the time...

I saw a tree fall in the woods, and I didn't hear it.

The sky is falling. No, I'm tipping over backwards.

If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to see it, do the other trees make fun of it?

I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.

I hate it when my leg falls asleep. I know that means it's going to be up all night.

Don't you hate when your hand falls asleep and you know it will be up all night.