We joke about having late-onset ADD. There are plenty of days I can't tell you what day it is. I can't remember my phone number. If you stopped me on the street and asked me, 'How old are you?' I couldn't tell you.
It still takes you by surprise. Some days you can't get out of bed. It's a down like you can't even begin to describe.
The grief sometimes gets so heavy that it's physically hard to breathe. The wound never heals. Little things -- like hearing a certain song on the radio -- just rip the scab right off.