Victor Borge Music Quotations

...the elephant smoked too much.

They say that Nero started the fire himself because he needed a suitable backdrop for his concert.

It (the double-clarinet in India) was primarily used for snake charming, since the snake would do almost anything to get the Indians to stop playing it.

Well, all's fair in love, war and fooling the critics.

The conductor is a peculiar person. He turns his back on his friends in the audience, shakes a stick at his players in the orchestra, and then wonders why nobody loves him.

Mendelssohn never wrote any Water Music. However, he wrote the Scotch Symphony, which is even better, or at least stronger.

I know [canned music] makes chickens lay more eggs and factory workers produce more. But how much more can they get out of you on an elevator?

Clarinets, like lawyers, have cases, mouthpieces, and they need a constant supply of hot air in order to function.