Joan Rivers Heart Quotations

Valentine's Day is different for old people. At this age I receive chocolates in boxes shaped like artificial hearts.

Edgar had a heart attack, and I'm to blame. We were making love, and I took the bag off my head.

I caused my husband's heart attack. In the middle of lovemaking I took the paper bag off my head. He dropped the Polaroid and keeled over and so did the hooker. It would have taken me half an hour to untie myself and call the paramedics, but fortunately the Great Dane could dial.

At my age an affair of the heart is a bypass!

Dont talk to me about Valentines Day. At my age an affair of the heart is a bypass!