Dating Quotations

I have experienced bad dating and ineptitude with women all across the globe, from Vietnam to Paris. When I was 21, women were an enigma; they were this code that had to be cracked. They were 'The Other.' I have often thought writing this stuff into stand-up and shows would be an exorcism, but it hasn't been; it makes no difference.

It's just me and my 6-month-old puppy. I am not dating anyone.

I was a weird teenager. My mother was actually worried because I didn't have any interest in dating in my teenage years. I had all this desire to pursue my passions like ballet, then sailing, then music, so I didn't have any emptiness to fill.

Who would want to get back together with Taylor Swift after having dated her? I'm sure dating her is like talking to a white sheet of paper with a little bit of vanilla ice cream on it that doesn't say anything.

I think probably - I think, you know, when you're first dating somebody, if they're just not that physical with you, if they don't want to make concrete plans with you, you know, if they're sort of ambiguous about where everything is going, I think that's a pretty good sign that they're not into you.

When I was five years old, I told my parents that I wanted to take ballet. So, ballet was the focus of my life... until puberty. Then I discovered boys and started dating a guy with a mohawk who'd come to my ballet class and freak everybody out. Shortly after that is when I quit.

It's ironic, really. Guys should be excited that I got Kristen Bell. If Brad Pitt gets Kristen Bell, it's like, 'Well, of course he did.' With me, it should be, 'Oh good, a normal-looking guy got her. Maybe I'll get me a Kristen Bell.' But guys hate my guts for always dating women I have no right to be with.

I don't talk about who I'm dating because when you break up, you wind up reliving it in the media.

To find a prince, you gotta kiss some toads.

A relationship requires a lot of work and commitment.

Women always try to see the one good part of The Weird Guy because the dating landscape is so bleak. Women will say, 'He's very odd, but he likes to cook. He's creepy, but he makes good pancakes!'

We are constantly protecting the male ego, and it's a disservice to men. If a man has any sensitivity or intelligence, he wants to get the straight scoop from his girlfriend.

If your best friend has stolen your girlfriend, it does become life and death.

Our nation is built upon a history of immigration, dating back to our first pioneers, the Pilgrims. For more than three centuries, we have welcomed generations of immigrants to our melting pot of hyphenated America: British-Americans; Italian-Americans; Irish-Americans; Jewish-Americans; Mexican-Americans; Chinese-Americans; Indian-Americans.

The funniest thing is I never understood why actors were so shady about who they're dating. Then I realized the things you say get printed and the people you're involved with read them. That's what's tricky. Nothing goes unnoticed. I don't want to get myself in trouble!

Facebook and pictures on the Internet have created such a different way of dating. It's not necessarily good because an obsessive quality can develop in people.

My wife and I have been together since 1986. I graduated in '86 and she graduated in '88. We began dating when she was 17. Actually she turned 18 when we started kissing and stuff.

Smallpox, which spreads by respiration and kills roughly one in three of those infected, took hundreds of millions of lives during a recorded history dating to Pharaonic Egypt. The last case was in 1978, and the disease was declared eradicated on May 8, 1980.

While I am aware of no counsel on whether kissing should be reserved only for post-mission dating or courtship, I am aware of plenty of counsel concerning honesty in our actions and treating others with respect and kindness. Casual attitudes about expressions of affection such as kissing can cause much grief and heartache.

I'm not interested in dating. I like being with my own best friend, me. Certain women, particularly older women, cannot believe I like going to a social event by myself. But I do.

It's always been my personal feeling that unless you are married, there is something that is not very dignified about talking about who you are dating.

The Laboratory for Radioactivity consisted of only two rooms at the time; at a later date, when tests of radioactive substances became more extensive, it expanded into four rooms.

Frankly, the reason I joined MENSA is because I was dating a guy at the time who spoke five languages and could solve a Rubik's Cube literally with his eyes closed because it's just an algorithm.

The release date is just one day, but the record is forever.

I love being a single mom. But it's definitely different when you're dating.

Mum left school at 15, and after a few years of modelling and dating jazz musicians, was married by 21 to my father, Mike Taylor, a journalist on the 'Daily Mirror.' They had my brother and me pretty quickly and had split up by the time I was two. I don't really have any memories of them as a couple.

We didn't realize it at the time, but the release date, the ad campaign and the poster are so important.

I started dating older men, and I would fall in love with them. I thought they could teach me about life.

I've been dating since I was fifteen. I'm exhausted. Where is he?

When it comes to dating, Im straightforward and traditional with a twist.

The Google algorithm was a significant development. I've had thank-you emails from people whose lives have been saved by information on a medical website or who have found the love of their life on a dating website.

I was dating a guy that was a huge wrestling fan and I'm embarrassed to say it now but I used to make fun of him for watching it.

I'm the one who's dating the craft-service guy instead of the producer. Plus, if a producer is going to date a hot young thing, I'm probably not the first person on their list - the weird, quirky, funny girl.

Without wearing any mask we are conscious of, we have a special face for each friend.

I had a few dating disasters along the way with girls cheating on me. One girl was the inspiration for me singing 'Cry Me A River' on 'The X Factor.' That was my payback to her because she was unfaithful.

In Indonesia, where I am from, the Dutch-imposed Civil Code dating back to the colonial 1870s prevailed until the 1974 Law on Marriage granted married women greater rights, including the ability to open individual bank accounts.

I think, at the end of the day, age is just a number. It's like, in real life, I've got friends who are dating someone their age or dating someone who's twice their age, and they're equally in love.

'Christian Mingle' is about a young, modern, single woman. She's trying to achieve it all - a successful career, amazing friends, and finding Mr. Right. She stumbles into the world of online dating looking for an instant 'soul mate solution,' but ultimately ends up taking a personal journey transforming her life.

I've got mates who have got married through meeting on Internet dating sites, so it really can work out - even if sometimes it does go disastrously wrong.

If I've been dating someone for, say, five months, and she cheats on me, I don't think it would be worth it. I'm not committed enough to the situation to give her a second chance.

I'm a bit of a romantic, to a fault. It's led me to some great things and also some sad things. It's made me a better person, to keep a good spirit about dating.

Workshops and seminars are basically financial speed dating for clueless people.

However successful you are, there is no substitute for a close relationship. We all need them.

At the time that I knew them, they were not living together. They began dating again after their divorce, so I didn't really see fighting.

I was dating this guy and we would spend all day text messaging each other. And he thought that he could tell that he liked me more because he actually spelt the word 'YOU' and I just put the letter 'U'.

Whenever you have an ex, and they're like, 'I hope we can still be friends!' and you weren't friends before you started dating, then what do you go back to, really?

I didn't want to be short. I've tried to pretend that being a short guy didn't matter. I tried to make up for being short by affecting a strut, by adopting the voice of a much bigger man, by spending more money than I made, by tipping double or triple at bars and restaurants, by dating tall, beautiful women.

I'm not very good at dating. I'm very decisive. If I like someone, then they're my boyfriend. It's pretty straightforward.

Stuff about me dating Kim Kardashian - I have no idea where that came from and all these other rumors. I don't think I'm that type.

I have very little experience with dating websites. My feeling toward dating websites is what most peoples is: If it works, great. If youre serious and legitimate about it and know what youre looking for, then from what I hear, its definitely effective.

Never let a fool kiss you, or a kiss fool you.

Oh, my dating skills are the worst. No, I pick the wrong men; it's amazing. I am awful, the worst dater.

Last year my boyfriend gave me a painting - a very personal one. I really prefer personal gifts or ones made by someone for me. Except diamonds. That's the exception to the rule.

I've had enough boyfriends and enough issues. I'd seen enough train wrecks.

I don't know any of us who are in relationships that are totally honest - it doesn't exist.

I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog.

What online dating did was offer me the opportunity to go out with a bunch of different people from different industries; I really didn't want to limit myself with people who are in the entertainment industry.

It's the fashion, I tell you: big, tall women going out with tiny, tiny men.

If you're a good Amish girl, you're courting, you have three or four different beaus, and you go out and stay out all night. That's just their tradition. They date under the covering of night. No one knows who they're dating or seeing until two weeks before they're going to be married. It's how they've done it for 300 years.

As and when I get into a relationship, I'll flaunt her to the world. I'm looking for a soul mate, and in any case, I'm not very much for casual dating. I'm such a simple guy away from this dating-shating business.

I want a guy I can go hiking with, who wants to do outdoorsy stuff. It's so much fun to be out in nature and who better to do that with than the person you're dating?

I'd been dating my husband for about a year, and I'd already kissed George Clooney, Ashton Kutcher and Gerard Butler. Awesome year, right?

When I first started dating my husband, I had this weird fascination with the circus and clowns and old carnival things and sideshow freaks and all that. About a month after we started dating, he bought me this amazing black-and-white photo book on the circus in the 1930s, and I started sobbing.

I can't even explain to you how terrible that feels, that I equate dating a woman with punishment, shame, guilt, disappointment, reproach, reprimand, persecution. It's a nightmare.

Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pickup truck, and end up with a station wagon.

You know, I do not know, I just want to date someone who makes me happy.

I always wanted so much glamour in my life, so I have always been obsessed with class, and from dating a few people who were from old money and a few from new money in my 20s, I just sort of became obsessed with this idea of clueless rich people.

My philosophy of dating is to just fart right away.

If you don't have a valentine, hang out with your girlfriends, don't go looking for someone. When it's right, they'll come to you.

The rich are different. Their wants are very high maintenance. They'll pick eye color and hair color, all the way down to what she does for a living, what school she went to. Their list can be extremely long. But at the end of the day, dating is dating, because they're human beings.

Here's the funny thing about the response I've been aware of to my dating famous people: It's been very negative. I'm either not good-looking enough, not a good enough actor or not successful enough for these people.

I love sushi. Once on Valentine's Day, someone I was dating rocked up at the airport to pick me up with a bag of salmon because I love it so much.

I can't even find someone for a platonic relationship, much less the kind where someone wants to see me naked.

I'm quite sensitive to women. I saw how my sister got treated by boyfriends. I read this thing that said when you are in a relationship with a woman, imagine how you would feel if you were her father. That's been my approach, for the most part.

I'm not interested in serial dating; I'd honestly rather be single.

When I was a boy, I took over the shed at the bottom of the garden and displayed fossils and potsherds and coins in it and proudly called it my 'museum'. I charged people to come in, and my most prized possession was a Saracen shield dating from the Crusades.

It's weird to have people so interested in your personal life. It's a part of the business that grosses me out. I'm always bummed out for people who just happen to be dating a celebrity, and they're also famous, and they can't live their life.

That's the awful thing about dating. Tight underwear. We would all like to be in a big bra and pants and when you are in a secure relationship you can do that.

We were led to a pediatric ophthalmologist. It's a hard date for me, April 14, 1998. The doctor came back from the examining room and told us she had tumors in both eyes.

It was funny actually because that was still during the time we were dating. He would get all these calls because supposedly before we broke up, we had already broken up in the trades, in the rags or whatever.

Dating is really hard because everyone puts on a front. It's really difficult to see who is who, so it is important to be yourself.

Dating, like almost every other male-female interaction in present-day society, is based on outmoded and unequal social roles and expectations.

I stopped dating for six months a year ago. Dating requires a lot of energy and focus.

I've always been intellectually restless, but it is the building part of it that most interests me. It is the constructing of the team that is my favorite part. Anyone who is familiar with the history of the A's franchise, even dating back to Philadelphia, knows that every five or 10 years, you have to tear it apart and rebuild it.

After a number of years dating, we decided we were good partners.

No one knew me until I met my wife Lulu. Lulu's mother used to ask, Which one is Maurice? For six months she thought Lulu was dating Barry.

I've never tried to pass myself off as anything more than a comedian who wrote a dating book.

Appearance is something you should definitely consider when you're going out. Have your girlfriend clip your nails or something like that.

Are you kidding? I'm a terrible cook, but John is a really great one. Literally, I never cook. The whole time we were dating, I prepared two officially romantic meals. Both of them were such disasters that he begs me never to go into the kitchen again.

I don't really talk about my personal life. It's a strange and funny and weird thing. Sometimes you have a conversation with someone and the paparazzi snaps a picture of you and people decide you're dating. If I try to answer everything people say, I would be up all night.

It's tough to be 68 and dating. I've given it up now.

I wish I was dating one of the ladies in 'Bollywood Hero.' They're gorgeous. Any of them.

Do not just look at your boyfriend as just a boyfriend. Look at him as a friend, too.

So May 4th in the labor movement has always been an important date.

People could rationally decide that prolonged relationships take up too much time and effort and that they'd much rather do other kinds of things. But most people are afraid of rejection.

I've never been speed dating! I sort of wish I had, just for the experience of it.

I've never done online dating, but first of all, I have a book out called 'Make It Last Forever: The Do's and The Dont's,' which led me to do the online dating thing. A lot of people respect my relationship songs, so they can pretty much trust me.

I'm opening up my heart to the idea of dating. It's funny - my friends would always come to me for romantic advice. I know nothing, and things have changed since I was dating in high school! I'm really trying hard to spend this time working on myself.

I am dating, but it is hard to find someone quick enough and funny enough. I am quite demanding.

So if I was dating somebody now and the relationship didn't work out, I'd take that as failing